LIFESTYLE

It’s the same scenario for countless busy couples, and especially those in the Real Estate industry: due to conflicting schedules and after-hours appointments, you pass like two ships in the night. You barely find time to say two sentences to each other, and when you do, it isn’t whispered words of romance, but rather reminders of day-to-day responsibilities (“Don’t forget, the car insurance is due tomorrow,” or, “Someone has to pick Bobby up from soccer practice at five-thirty!”).

When we reminisce about the early days of our relationships, it seems a far cry from the almost perfunctory pairing of the present. It’s natural for things to change over the course of time—we can’t keep those “squishy” feelings forever or we’d never get anything done. But when your interactions with your significant other have dwindled to a bare minimum, it’s time for some relationship rescue.

I can hear you now: “I’m just so busy!” But the bottom line is, your relationship is one of the most important aspects of your wellbeing, and it must be taken care of accordingly, not left to languish. When you’re happy in your personal life, it reflects in your professional life. Taking the time to feel connected to and understood by your partner will keep you fulfilled—not to mention it’s a great model for your children and will no doubt carry over into their own adult relationships.

The sad fact is, we think we can neglect “couple time” for the better part of a year, then make it all up with a week’s vacation, but that isn’t so. Like gardens, partnerships require regular maintenance to keep them healthy and strong, not just one or two chunks of time every few months. So the first and most important thing to remember is that you absolutely must schedule in regular time with your significant other—even if it means dropping one or two other things—and keep those appointments as if your life depended on it. Once you’ve penciled (no, ballpoint penned, in all caps) this precious block of time into your schedule, here’s what you can do with it to keep things solid.

Turn off the TV. I know it may seem like quality time if the two of you are sitting within a few feet of each other long enough to catch a couple of sitcom reruns, but it isn’t. Staring blankly at the boob tube is not interacting, so switch it off and get face to face with your loved one. Similarly, if you’re ever in the car together running an errand, turn off the radio and talk instead.

Buy some valuable time. And I do mean literally. Forking over the cash for a maid service, a babysitter, a gardener or a handyman can free up enough time in your schedule to do something you enjoy with a person you enjoy. Consider it an investment.

Take advantage of technology. With all the quick and convenient messaging mediums available today—e-mail, voicemail, texting—it’s easy to use them in your quest for meaningful communication. A few flirtatious texts a day, a five-minute phone conversation just to see how things are going, or even a quick “I love you,” can keep you connected wherever you are.

Share a meal. It can be a 10-minute togetherness session over a morning McMuffin, but it’s 10 minutes well spent and will leave you feeling like a team for the rest of the day. Or schedule a lunch date at least once a week. You’d do it for a client, so why not for the one you love?

Have some good, clean fun. You’ve both got to shower, right? Save time—and water—and feel a little closer to your partner by showering together, even if it’s more of a “get-in-get-out” than a steamy love scene.

Do the date thing. At least once a month, schedule a date night. It doesn’t have to be anything extravagant or expensive, just a few uninterrupted hours where the two of you get out and do something together. Make a rule that you can’t spend the time talking about anything mundane: the kids, the bills, the items on the growing “honey-do” list.

Chip in on the chores. And speaking of the “honey-do” list, it may sound a little lame, but sometimes working side-by-side on a task can inspire good conversation. Do the dishes or the gardening together, or take it a step further and tackle a home improvement project you’ve both wanted to try (make sure it’s something you can put away and work on in sections as time allows). Enjoy your time together and revel in whatever you accomplish, no matter how small.

Add a touch of class. Cooking classes, dancing lessons, foreign language instruction—if there’s something you both enjoy, why not sign up for a course? Instructional classes aren’t usually that time-consuming—you’ll commit just a couple hours per week—and you’ll kill two birds with one stone by being together with your partner and learning a new skill. And once you’ve taken the class, you can continue the tradition of togetherness by practicing what you’ve learned.

You can’t brush your teeth once a month and expect not to have cavities; ignore your teeth and they’ll go away—it’s the same with relationships. You also can’t be a couch potato and expect to run a marathon. And you can’t skimp on quality time with your special someone and expect to have a healthy, happy, connected partnership—it simply can’t be done. But luckily for those with hectic schedules, routine relationship maintenance doesn’t take much time, it’s just a matter of effort and commitment. If you can give your sweetie those two things, you’ll be giving much more in the process.